What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding
So, you've been busy little bees, huh? While you were, ahem, "breeding", I was out here living my best life. Let's rewind, shall we? When in Rome... I kicked things off in t...
So, you've been busy little bees, huh? While you were, ahem, "breeding", I was out here living my best life. Let's rewind, shall we?
When in Rome...
I kicked things off in the Eternal City. Now, I'm no Romeo, but I sure knew how to make the most of my time. I was sipping espresso like a local, tossing coins into the Trevi Fountain (wish I could tell you what for, but a lady never tells), and even tried my hand at pasta-making. Let's just say, my spaghetti wasn't as, uh, "al dente" as I'd hoped.
Art Attack
I spent hours getting lost in the Vatican Museums. You know, just your average Joe, admiring Michelangelo's Sistine Chapel ceiling. I mean, who needs Netflix when you've got that masterpiece to binge-watch, am I right?
Must Read
From Rome to... Roam?
Next stop? The wild, wild west. I traded in my beret for a cowboy hat and hit the trails in Yellowstone. Bison sightings, geyser chases (Old Faithful, I'm looking at you), and nights under the stars - it was like a real-life National Treasure adventure. No, Nicolas Cage didn't make an appearance, but a girl can dream, right?
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Under the Sea
I swapped land for sea and found myself in the Maldives. Snorkeling, sunbathing, and sipping on piña coladas - it was the definition of "tough life". I even swam with whale sharks. They're massive, but don't worry, mom, they're gentle giants!
Back to the Future
Time to fast-forward. I've been busy learning to code, trying out new recipes (hello, sourdough!), and even picked up a new language - Spanish. ¡Hola, amigos!
READ – “What I was doing while you were breeding: a memoir” – NOTHING
And you? Well, you've been, shall we say, "expanding your family". Congrats, by the way! But next time, maybe give a girl a heads-up before disappearing into the baby-making zone. A text would've been nice.
Anyway, it's been a hoot! Now, who's ready for a playdate? I've got some serious catching up to do. And yes, I'll bring the wine - non-alcoholic, of course. Cheers!
